As we prepare for another episode of the Bachelorette starring Tayshia, I wanted to take a moment to focus on Jason’s departure and why things like this happen.
In a real world, when someone has feelings for someone else, we either tell them and get rejected or we tell them and we get a surprise, they feel the same way. More on that in a minute.
But in a Bachelorette/Bachelor world, as we’ve seen in season after season, it was more about the “contestants” exposing their feelings first until the very end where we all find out who the bachelor or bachelorette is falling in love with. Have some of the “rules” been broken, sure.
Brad Wolmack became one of the most hated bachelors leaving both DeAnna Pappas and Jenni Croft, telling them while had had envision both being a great wife, he wasn’t ready to propose to either of them. Cold feet…maybe?
Jason Mesnick who dumped Molly in favor of Melissa Rycroft had me questioning his choice after the hysteria of tears he cried when she left. But it wasn’t until “After the Final Rose” he admitted to Melissa he couldn’t get Molly out of his mind and it was her he loved all along. If I’m not mistaken, he even mentioned on that episode he had one of the producers to get in touch with Molly to see if she would give him another chance. Clearly, Jason had all grounds covered by the time the Final Rose aired.
Another one was Arie Luyendyk took the liberty of breaking up with Becca right on camera when in one of their “secret get togethers”, admitting he made a mistake in proposing to her and it was Lauren he wanted all along. I mean OUCH! Now I have my own thoughts on this. Arie is from Scottsdale and yes, I am going there, knowing what kind of prudes live there, it was easier to have a nice and demure woman like Lauren as a wife, as oppose to Becca who is a bit more outspoken than Lauren is.
Sometimes it ain’t always about love but about what looks good for the outside world to see.
Now let’s talk about Jason, because even though he didn’t get as far as the above did, he opened up rather quickly with Clare and felt he can trust her and he wouldn’t get his heart broken, and well…he did get his heart broken.
While all the guys were happy to pursue a relationship with Clare, it came with challenges, in the form of Dale. And it was clear from the beginning all the guys were competing more against Dale, rather than Clare’s heart. But for Jason, Dale was not the issue, opening up was.
On his one to one date, he confessed to Clare about his fears being in a relationship and the risk factor of getting hurt was not an option he desired, especially in this process of Bachelorette. Because of Clare assuring him it was okay to open up, Jason took a risk and trusted in the process but didn’t expect in a few short weeks, Clare would tell all the guys she’s moving on and choosing Dale.
People may say, it’s too soon to have feelings, or maybe he was just infatuated.
Sure, we can all think that, but that doesn’t take away if one does have real feelings for someone. In real life, yes, people can develop feelings much sooner than others. We’ll use me as an example.
In 2019, I worked for a client and during those months, I developed feelings for the guy I worked with. He pretty much figured it out, however, he didn’t reciprocate the same feelings for a lot of different reasons. And while I can list all the reasons, the fact remains, if he did care, if he did have any ounce of feelings for me, they would have been shared, and they were not.
Jason, more or less, in a similar situation, can sit there and say, he can wait for Clare believing that perhaps it won’t work out with Dale and he will be her saving grace. Haven’t we all felt that way about someone (in a non stalkerish way my friends). We can all get stuck on someone believing if certain events may have not happened or if the circumstances were different, perhaps they would feel different towards us.
Jason didn’t give himself the chance to open up and learn more about Tayshia and there’s nothing wrong with that, however, if he closes himself up and allows himself believe, somewhere along the line Clare and Dale are doomed to failure and he will be there to pick up the pieces will be too much of an expectation he cannot afford when it comes to love and any future relationship.
Being in love is a great feeling. To be able to spend time with someone you greatly care about, there’s nothing like it. But the feeling of being hurt and rejected can be just as equally intense, if not more.
I wanted to focus on Jason, because I relate to his disappointment in many ways. And in some ways, I haven’t allowed myself to get to know someone else. But not because of the mindset of thinking this guy I like will come around. I’ve just gotten to the point where the mindless tit for tat doesn’t work for me anymore and I would rather spend my time doing what I love instead of looking for love.
As for Jason, I’m sure there’s a great lady waiting in the wings for him and when he finds it, it will absolutely be better than anything he thought he had with Clare.
Until then. Take care of you.